{"id":43749,"date":"2018-01-03T20:15:04","date_gmt":"2018-01-04T02:15:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/?p=43749"},"modified":"2018-01-03T20:15:32","modified_gmt":"2018-01-04T02:15:32","slug":"the-view-from-the-balcony-how-i-spent-my-christmas-vacation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/the-view-from-the-balcony-how-i-spent-my-christmas-vacation\/","title":{"rendered":"The View from the Balcony: How I Spent My Christmas Vacation"},"content":{"rendered":"

My son, Jonas, moved to Snowmass, Colorado, a few months ago. I spent Christmas with him. It was a no-brainer.<\/span><\/p>\n

I bought some lottery tickets on the way to the airport. I lost.<\/span><\/p>\n

I flew United. I remembered that earlier in 2017 a doctor was beaten and dragged from a United flight for not giving up his seat. He wasn\u2019t on this flight. There were no incidents. Probably because everybody else remembered, too. That and the fact that the flight crew wasn\u2019t wearing the standard wings pin on their lapels. They had on pins that said Gestapo Airlines. Guess they thought it would be a good deterrent. It was.<\/span><\/p>\n

The flight from Memphis to Houston was fine. The flight from Houston to Aspen wasn\u2019t. Thirty minutes from Aspen the Gestapo said it was snowing too hard in Aspen to land there. We\u2019d be going to Denver instead. That\u2019s not what my ticket said. I wanted to protest, but then I remembered the doctor who had the crap beaten out of him.<\/span><\/p>\n

I stood in line for over an hour with my flight mates at the United customer service counter. An elderly lady passed out. There were no flights to Aspen until the next morning and those couldn\u2019t be guaranteed.<\/span><\/p>\n

Some guy with a foreign accent who looked like a cross between Salvador Dali and a cheesy magician said he was going to rent a car and drive to Aspen. He asked me if I wanted a ride. I wondered if he knew how to drive in the snow. I wondered if he was a foreign agent who\u2019d come to kidnap Americans. \u201cNo, thank you,\u201d I said.<\/span><\/p>\n

A young lady standing next to me whispered, \u201cThere\u2019s no way I\u2019d let that guy drive me to Aspen,\u201d but she did. I was sorry I didn\u2019t get her name and the contact information for her next of kin.<\/span><\/p>\n

Jonas got in his four-runner and drove to Denver. His three-hour trip took four. It was snowing hard. It was windy. Jonas\u2019 windshield was caked with mudice. No de-icer. He pressed onward.<\/span><\/p>\n

We stopped for gas. I bought some de-icer. It worked. Jonas said, \u201cThat was a great idea, Dad.\u201d I said, \u201cI know.\u201d He said, \u201cThanks.\u201d I said, \u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d Later in the week Jonas got his car stuck in the snow. He used the de-icer to get unstuck. He laughed and said, \u201cThe de-icer was a great idea, Dad.\u201d I said, \u201cI know.\u201d He said, \u201cThanks.\u201d I said, \u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

We skied Buttermilk Mountain. Dale Evans\u2019 horse was named Buttermilk. Skiing Buttermilk was supposed to be as easy as riding Dale Evans\u2019 horse. It would have been except that I hadn\u2019t skied in ten years. Back then I was doing triathlons. Not now. My skiing was so bad they\u2019re thinking of changing the name of the mountain to Butterbutt.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

We woke up to a white Christmas \u2013 my first. We opened gifts \u2013 Jonas, his dog Scripty, and me. Then we went to one of Jonas\u2019 friend\u2019s house for brunch. We opened more gifts. One young lady gave Jonas a book by Oxford\u2019s Tom Franklin. Turned out she was Carla Jean Whitley, formerly of Birmingham (Alabama). She knows Tom and Beth Ann (Fennelly). She also wrote Muscle Shoals Sound Studio<\/em> (available at Square Books). Small world, huh?<\/span><\/p>\n

The day of my departure I got up and made coffee. I checked my bank accounts. Someone had stolen my card number. They were having a high old time riding around in California. My bank took care of it. Still, it was a pain in the ass.<\/span><\/p>\n

Jonas took me to the Aspen airport. He said, \u201cGoodbye, Dad. I had a great time. I love you.\u201d I said, \u201cGoodbye, Jonas. I had a great time. I love you, too.\u201d Then he left. I went inside to learn that my flight to Houston had been delayed. Snow. I think people who have airports where it snows should be better prepared for it. Just saying.<\/span><\/p>\n

I waited with all the other delayed passengers. I sat across from a college-aged girl. I was wearing a Square Books t-shirt. She said, \u201cI love The Square! I almost went to Ole Miss.\u201d Small world, huh?<\/span><\/p>\n

The Gestapo at the gate called my name. She asked if I\u2019d change seats with a lady so she could sit with her children. I thought of the doctor who got the crap beaten out of him. I changed seats. The lady said, \u201cThank you.\u201d I said, \u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d The Gestapo gate keeper said, \u201cThanks.\u201d I said, \u201cYou\u2019re welcome, ma\u2019am.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

I missed my connection in Houston. Had to take a later flight to Memphis.<\/span><\/p>\n

I got my car at the Park & Ride. I was merging onto Airways Boulevard. A piece of the curb jumped out and hit my front passenger side tire. Tore the sucker up. It was cold as a well digger\u2019s butt in Idaho. I called my insurance company. They had a guy there lickity-split. I asked if he\u2019d brought hot chocolate. He didn\u2019t answer. He changed my tire. I said, \u201cThank you.\u201d He said, \u201cYou\u2019re welcome.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

I bought some lottery tickets on the way home. I lost.<\/span><\/p>\n

It was still a great Christmas. It was a great Christmas because Christmas isn\u2019t about schedules or money or blown out tires. It\u2019s about love. I got to be with my son. I love him with all my heart. We had a wonderful time. That\u2019s what matters most to me.<\/span><\/p>\n

And that\u2019s the view from The Balcony.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

My son, Jonas, moved to Snowmass, Colorado, a few months ago. I spent Christmas with him. It was<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":262,"featured_media":39753,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[307],"tags":[11420,11419,9773,11416,10286,11417,11418,10426],"class_list":["post-43749","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-local-people","tag-aspen","tag-buttermilk-montain","tag-colorado","tag-jonas-weeks","tag-randy-weeks","tag-snowmass","tag-united-airlines","tag-view-from-the-balcony"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/2017-5-11-View-from-the-Balcony.jpg?fit=600%2C400&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43749","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/262"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=43749"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/43749\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/39753"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=43749"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=43749"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=43749"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}