{"id":165648,"date":"2026-09-09T08:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-09-09T13:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/?p=165648"},"modified":"2026-09-08T15:37:16","modified_gmt":"2026-09-08T20:37:16","slug":"the-view-beyond-the-balcony-conversation-with-a-grove-tree","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/the-view-beyond-the-balcony-conversation-with-a-grove-tree\/","title":{"rendered":"The View Beyond The Balcony: “Conversation with a Grove Tree”"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Last week I decided to take a stroll through The Grove. I found refuge from the heat in the shade of all the beautiful leaves on the trees. I found an especially inviting tree trunk, so I sat down and leaned on it. I was on the verge of sleep when I felt a gentle nudge on my back. I ignored it, only to receive a stronger nudge. I looked around to see who might be poking me, but there was no one there. All of a sudden a root of the tree lifted itself from the earth. It gave me a shove that sent me sprawling. Then I heard a gruff voice (think the talking trees from The Wizard of Oz) say, \u201cGet off me, cowboy!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Still on my back, wondering if this was a nightmare. I knew I wasn\u2019t drunk. I decided to do the unthinkable\u2014I talked back,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re a tree\u2014and a talking one at that!\u201d
No shite, Sherlock!<\/em>
\u201cYou don\u2019t have to be a smart-ash about it!\u201d
Good god. I\u2019m a grand oak, not an ash! So you can kiss my non-ash ash!
<\/em>\u201cOkay. I apologize. We got off on the wrong root.\u201d
It\u2019s okay. I won\u2019t bark at you, you sap!
<\/em>\u201cSpeaking of bark, it looks like you\u2019re missing some. A few limbs, too.\u201d
Blame Fern. She really did a number on us.
<\/em>\u201cYeah. That\u2019s for sure. Do you think y\u2019all are ready for the first home game?\u201d
Are we ready? Hell yeah! Damn right! Hotty Tot…
<\/em>\u201cAlright, alright, alright. Enough of that! Are you really ready?
Of course! We\u2019re always ready. Once people put their tents up they\u2019re gonna start drinking\u2014if they haven\u2019t already. After a few Bud Lights they won\u2019t even notice we\u2019re damaged goods. And if some fans forget to use their red and blue solo cups security will pour their beer out. Once it soaks in we\u2019ll be sauced, too.
Can\u2019t wait to get my buzz on! And when the band plays, we\u2019ll start (singing) slow dancin\u2019, swayin\u2019 to the music. We\u2019ll make a breeze and everybody\u2019ll be happy!<\/em>
\u201cAre y\u2019all worried about anything?\u201d
ICE.
<\/em>\u201cIce? It\u2019s September. The only ice in The Grove will be ice to keep the food and drinks cold.\u201d
Not that kind of ice. The capital I capital C capital E kind of ICE!
<\/em>\u201cYou gotta be kiddin\u2019 me!\u201d
I kid you not. After the cherry trees in D.C. got slaughtered, none of us are safe!
<\/em>\u201cBut no trees have been arrested.\u201d
Not yet.
<\/em>\u201cBut y\u2019all are American, born and bred.\u201d
It don\u2019t seem to matter. Hell, they might dig us up and send us to Argentina! They might turn us into lumber and ship us up above the Mason Dixon Line. We\u2019re Rebels, not Yankees!
<\/em>\u201cWhat about your I.D.s?\u201d
I\u2019m sure the University has those records, but that don\u2019t seem to matter either. It didn\u2019t matter with the cherry trees, so why would it matter with us?
<\/em>\u201cPoint well taken. Is there anything y\u2019all do to try to stop this?\u201d
Kinda sorta. We do have ways to irritate people. Sometimes, especially when rain has turned The Grove into a super-sized slip \u2018n slide, we\u2019ll lift a root just enough for people to trip over it and fall flat-faced in the mud! Revenge is sweet!
<\/em>\u201cIs there anything you want people to know about this? I do have a venue to pass information along.\u201d
Yeah. We\u2019re on the verge of PTFD.
<\/em>\u201cPTFD?\u201d
Yeah. Pre-Traumatic Felling Disorder. It\u2019s a reaction to the bulldozing of the cherry trees in D.C. We can\u2019t hold our sap. We may look fine on the outside, but underneath this bark we\u2019re sappin\u2019 all over ourselves. (sighs) Just tell folks that trees have feelings, too. It\u2019s a proven fact that we communicate with each other. When one of us hurts, we all hurt. Practice kindness toward us and we\u2019ll practice kindness toward you.
Now, why don\u2019t you make like a tree and leaf, Hootie Tootie? (laughs)<\/em>
So I did.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026and that\u2019s the View from Beyond The Balcony.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Randy Weeks is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Board Certified Telemental Health Provider, a Certified Shamanic Life Coach, an ordained minister, singer-songwriter, actor, and writer, and, yes, he is a tree-hugger.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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