{"id":114499,"date":"2021-10-06T16:57:34","date_gmt":"2021-10-06T21:57:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/?p=114499"},"modified":"2021-10-06T21:37:04","modified_gmt":"2021-10-07T02:37:04","slug":"notes-in-my-phone-iv","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/notes-in-my-phone-iv\/","title":{"rendered":"The View From The Balcony: “Notes in My Phone IV”"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

More stuff I\u2019ve heard, read, or thought from The Balcony and elsewhere.<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Genu flecked. It was only the slightest of flecks, but she had forgotten that in the presence of these gargantuan fleckers, even the slightest misstep in faux flecking would bring down the cumulative ire of true flecking fleckers, flecking far and wide. It suddenly came to him: he was totally flecked no matter which direction he took.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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\u2022 Not everyone drinks from the same fountain. \u2022 I\u2019m a much better sinner than I am a saint. \u2022 Ain\u2019t it a ditch?! \u2022 I\u2019ll pull your mythical underwear over you storied head. \u2022 You\u2019re the sous chef of love. \u2022 Gender euphoria. \u2022 A butterfly still has the same heart as it did when it was a caterpillar. \u2022 She\u2019s been acting half better\u2026in a Mississippi way. \u2022 Homostupidus. \u2022 Unfiltered disappointment. \u2022 Will you be the one who has the dates you were born and died with a hyphen in between on your tombstone and that hyphen was your life? \u2022 Conversationis interruptus. \u2022 Bootyism. \u2022 I\u2019d rather go to the dentist than fool with my Etsy. \u2022 It\u2019s not primitive unless you stink. \u2022 Grab life by the beaver nuggets. \u2022 Narstatistic. \u2022 Not going in my grave without my uterus. \u2022 Polipop religion. \u2022 Our calling to be is an invitation to participate with the Divine. \u2022 In frequently. \u2022 I eat and I know things. \u2022 Do you know anyone who has some inertia I could snort right up my nostril? \u2022 Heliogasms. \u2022 You\u2019ll smother in a Yeti chest. \u2022 Co-pathetic. \u2022 I am a well-known schmuck. \u2022 Ambisextrious. \u2022 Mindfully Pentecostal. \u2022 People thought Jesus was blasphemous too. \u2022 Dudesplain. \u2022 Denialism: Denial of my nihilism. \u2022 She talks like a Gatling gun. \u2022 It\u2019s expensive to be poor. \u2022 Don\u2019t abuse someone else\u2019s generosity. \u2022 The Universe has done heard that crap. \u2022 A cake is more a cake when you\u2019ve dropped it on the floor. \u2022 They say I\u2019m dying, but who ain\u2019t? \u2022 My mother taught me how to throw up using a pen. She always knew how to help out. \u2022 I\u2019ve had a lot of dreams, but I never had a plan. \u2022 Salt Lake City: home of the Stepford lesbians. \u2022 I could photoshop that out. \u2022 But I\u2019m only going to marry you a little bit. \u2022 God is whatever pulls your face out of the dirt. (Gilbert)<\/em> \u2022 When people show you who they are, believe them the first time (Maya Angelou)<\/em> \u2022 If the kazoo fits, blow it. \u2022 When we are killed the past is killed. When kids are killed the future dies. There\u2019s no life without the future. (Hold the Dark \u2013 movie)<\/em> \u2022 Academic goosebumps. \u2022 You heard me better than I heard myself. \u2022 Everybody needs to be able to hiccup without judgment. \u2022 Even our worst mistakes don\u2019t separate us from humanity (Wes Moore)<\/em> \u2022 What must it be like to have a Jesus palette? \u2022 My left ear is not right. \u2022 I can\u2019t write a song like anyone but me. \u2022 I looked like everything you\u2019d lost. (JM)<\/em> \u2022 Close fetched. \u2022 Do I have ringlets yet? \u2022 Where\u2019s the corndog? \u2022 I can play in that arena. \u2022 You\u2019re a big ole ball of good. \u2022 When I\u2019m sober I\u2019m a stand up human being. \u2022 Obeast. \u2022 Analyze, anal eyes. \u2022 Fishing for compassion. \u2022 Lack of judgment is my spiritual gift. \u2022 Slumming with my Cheetos. \u2022 Watusi woosie. \u2022 I do my best work in the dark. \u2022 Everybody wants to feed me Jesus. \u2022 Stronger than eight rows of onions. (Gene Chisik)<\/em> \u2022 Faux chivalry. \u2022 Cognitive dissidents. \u2022 I\u2019d rather flirt with failure than not dance with my joy. (Wes Moore)<\/em> \u2022 Inverted reality. \u2022 I don\u2019t do this but look at what I did. \u2022 If they goal is losing, they\u2019re winning. \u2022 I feel like he didn\u2019t give me enough cherries. \u2022 Maybe I will, maybe I won\u2019t. Maybe I did, maybe I don\u2019t. \u2022 Ask my neurons. (LG) <\/em>\u2022 Every dress is a Sazerac dress. \u2022 There\u2019s a snail in it now. \u2022 Concentrating on a bauble. \u2022 He knows it\u2019s time to leave but he can\u2019t figure it out. \u2022 He needed to learn to let her be her own donut. \u2022 There are some things you wish you didn\u2019t feel, but you do. \u2022 My brain never let me agree to this. (LG)<\/em> \u2022 I\u2019ve been coming to this Balcony for 25 years and it always felt sturdy to me. (LB)<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026 and that\u2019s the view from The Balcony.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Randy Weeks is a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Certified Shamanic Life Coach, an ordained minister, and a singer-songwriter. He may be reached at randallsweeks@gmail.com.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

More stuff I\u2019ve heard, read, or thought from The Balcony and elsewhere. Genu flecked. It was only the<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":262,"featured_media":39753,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11902],"tags":[31,19614,10286,10878],"class_list":["post-114499","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-randy-weeks","tag-city-grocery","tag-notes-in-my-phone","tag-randy-weeks","tag-the-view-from-the-balcony"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/05\/2017-5-11-View-from-the-Balcony.jpg?fit=600%2C400&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/114499","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/262"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=114499"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/114499\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/39753"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=114499"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=114499"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.thelocalvoice.net\/oxford\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=114499"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}